Waiting is the whole thing.
You take a number and you stand in one global line with everybody else who is here. When the door reaches your number it opens, and something happens.
Most of the time the something is nothing at all, and we would rather tell you that now than at the end. Nobody is padding the count, nobody is holding you back to make the wait feel longer, and there is nothing to buy that would move you up.
- 6s
- per person at the door
- 20
- named endings, all written
- 60%
- of them are some form of nothing
- 0
- accounts, emails or passwords
The small print
- Your number
- It comes from one sequence that has been running since the line opened. Nobody can buy a better one and nobody can skip. Go through the door and come back, and you start again at the end.
- 90 seconds
- Close the tab and your place is held for 90 seconds. After that it is gone and the line moves past it. An abandoned place never slows anybody else down, which is the only reason this works at all.
- 2 minutes at the door
- When the door reaches you, you have 2 minutes to take what is behind it. Miss the window and the door moves on without you, and you can take another number.
Your place lives in one cookie and nothing else. There is no account to make, no password to forget and no email to give us.
Twenty things behind the door
Every one of them is written, built and actually in the pool. The rarities are set by the house and we are not hiding them.
- Common
- 60%
- Unusual
- 30%
- Rare
- 9%
- Legendary
- 1%
The Duck of Destiny
Common, so roughly 60 in every 100 people get it
You're not the one.
A duck in a very small suit looked at you, said four words, and shut the door.
Live from the door
- The door last gave somebody
- Invisible Prize · common
- King of the Internet
- k6 557 · 255s left
- Happening to the whole line
- nothing, it never lasts
Someone became King
A new King of the Internet has been crowned behind the door. The crown is visible to everyone in the line.
252s left. 0 votes so far.
Take a number to get a vote. One vote each, and changing your mind is not an option.
Things to do while nothing happens
The pointless button
It does nothing. It has always done nothing. The counter is real and global.
30,033 presses, worldwide, ever
Pressing it needs a number. The count is real either way.
Rotate the potato
It is a potato and it turns. That is the activity in its entirety.
0 rotations, worldwide, ever
Turning it needs a number as well. We do not know why either.
Name the duck
The duck behind the door answers to whatever the line decides. The winner is used in the endings.
Currently winning: Beverly
Votes belong to people standing in the line. Take a number and you get one.
The dumbest decision
Of everything a person can do here, the line votes on which is the least defensible.
Currently winning: Letting a duck decide things
Votes belong to people standing in the line. Take a number and you get one.
The numbers so far
All of these come out of the same database the queue runs on. None of them is rounded up, seeded or decorated.
- People served
- 191
- Waiting right now
- 339
- Pointless presses
- 30,033
- Potato rotations
- 0
- Fragments found
- 3 of 10
WALL
Rarest endings
- k6 557King of the Internet
- k6 146King of the Internet
- k6 10Global Potato Rain
- k6 125The Secret Fragment
- k6 25The Secret Fragment
- k6 3Global Potato Rain
- k6 4The Secret Fragment
- k6 27King of the Internet
On the wall
- k6 255The Big Red Button
- k6 557King of the Internet
- k6 146King of the Internet
- k6 10Global Potato Rain
- k6 125The Secret Fragment
- k6 25The Secret Fragment
- k6 3Global Potato Rain
- k6 4The Secret Fragment
Nothing here was chosen by us. Every rare and legendary ending puts its own entry on the wall the moment the door hands it over, under whatever name the person typed on their ticket, or under their number if they did not type one. The full wall, every past event and the mystery so far each have a page of their own.
Questions
Is it really nothing? Most of the time, yes. Sixty percent of everything behind that door is some form of nothing, and the exact odds for all four rarities are printed in the catalogue above.
Can I lose my place? Yes. Ninety seconds without your browser checking in and the place is gone. The line then moves past it without pausing, which is the only reason a few thousand abandoned tabs do not bring the whole thing to a halt.
Can I pay to go first? No, and there is nothing to buy. Every number comes out of the same sequence in the order it was asked for, and no amount of money, refreshing or cleverness changes that.
Are the other people real? Yes. There are no filler numbers and no padded counts. If the line says four hundred and twelve people are waiting, four hundred and twelve browsers are waiting.
Is my wait made up? No. It is your position multiplied by the door’s rhythm, both of which are real and both of which are on the ticket. Nobody is holding you back to make the wait feel more dramatic.
Do I need an account? No. Your place lives in one cookie. Your result lives at its own address, so you can keep it, send it to somebody or ignore it.
What is the mystery? There are ten fragments of one thing and the line uncovers them one at a time, by accident. Everything found so far is public, including who found it and when.
Can I come back? Yes, as often as you like. You go to the end of the line like everybody else, and your old result keeps its address for as long as this exists.
What happens to my data? One cookie with a random identifier, and a hashed fingerprint of your address and browser used only to stop one person taking a thousand numbers. No email, no profile, no tracking across other sites.
Who made this and why? One person, because the idea of several thousand strangers queueing for nothing at the same time was funnier than not building it.
The line is still moving.
Take a number339 people are standing in it at this exact moment, and it takes about four seconds to join them.